Frances is 7 Months!

Every month brings new milestones.  Frances rolls all over to get to her desired destinations now.  She's attempting to eat food and loves her exersaucer.  She's a delightful baby with a very even temperament.  We are so blessed to have Frances in our family.

Gratitude Sunday {All Grace}

 

Please help me welcome Cecilia Rose into the Catholic Church!  She was baptized today.  Jesse and I are honored to be her godparents.

 

As I chatted with people at the Baptism party I recalled my story back to the Catholic Church.  I can look back and see God's Hand all along but while it was happening I was out of control.  I didn't know where to turn or what to do.  Not until I opened my heart and really put Jesus first.  Our pastor often reminds us to ask Jesus for more of Him.  So that's what I do.  Every hour of everyday.  I'm grateful for the Graces that come with the gifts of the sacraments.  Graces are supernatural powers that allow us to tap into them and get through even the hardest trials.  It is especially during those trials I have learned that everything in my life, everything good, every little thing day in and day out is ALL HIS GRACE.  He allows it, He gets me through it, He gives me little gifts along the way. 

 

"I can do all things through Christ Who strengthens me" Philippians 4:13.  I might add to that I can ONLY do things because Christ strengthens me.  When you are stripped down to nothing it's then that you realize *all* you have is God.  That is truly the best place to be.  I take no credit for anything.  It's all God, all Grace.

 

So welcome little Cecilia.  May you be strengthened by the Grace of the Sacraments and feel Christ's love all around you.  You are blessed with a family who is in love with Jesus.  That's the best start in the world.

Happy 9th Birthday Sam {One Day Late}

Late is the story of my life these days.  Sam celebrated his 9th birthday yesterday.  I took him for a treat at Panera, my parents took him (and the rest of the kids) to see the Lego Movie, and then we celebrated with dinner and cake last night.  I attempted a lego cake....it's the thought that counts.  Especially when the red comes out pink.  Oh well.  He liked it.

Sam was born at home weighing in at 10lbs even.  We are so blessed to have Sam in our family.

Follow Me {Homeschooling in the Hard Times}

 

I honestly stumbled upon homeschooling in a round about way about 14 years ago.  I wasn't active in the Church then and certainly didn't pray about the road our family should take but looking back I see God's Hand was guiding me.  It was homeschooling that brought me to an amazing Catholic community that brought me (us) back to the Catholic Church.  So here we are.  14 years later.  We've homeschooled through births and miscarriages, deaths and hard times.  But this year has truly been one of the greatest trials.  I don't think I've done a full week, follow the lesson plans, do all the work homeschooling since early October.  I've struggled with thoughts that maybe the kids should go to school.  Each time I heard "follow Me".  I wondered if He really wanted me to homeschool if He could be a little clearer and show me the way.  I've spent days and even weeks (early on) engulfed in a grief that I can't fully describe.  But each day I got out of bed and pulled out at least a book or two, played a game, done some crafts, read some stories....bought a new App (just being real here) and at the end of the day I was grateful for the gift.  This isn't a school vs homeschool post.  This is a "God will reward you if you at least *try* to follow Him" post. 

 

In these past months I've felt like I was stripped of everything that I knew.  Everything that I thought was reality wasn't.  Well, not everything but alot.  Yet we studied the catechism most days (the littles use the Baltimore catechism - perfectly basic and straight to the point for a mom that was wondering if this really WAS the Faith for her).  If  I wasn't homeschooling I wouldn't be studying a child's Baltimore Catechism.  I would have been overwhelmed with theology and struggled further.  Instead it was "Who made us?" (God made us)  "Why did God make us?" (God made us to know, love, and serve Him in this life and to be with Him in the next life).  Perfect.  I can handle that. 

 

Some days I look around on Facebook or Pinterest or the many (beautiful) blogs and think "wow, I am seriously a homeschooling/mother loser."  There are so many people out there in their (seemingly) perfect homes with perfect kids following the perfect curriculum and making perfect meals besides.  Then there's me.   Imperfect, messy, often unmotivated. 

 

One day in adoration I heard "Be still and know that I am God".  It brought peace to my heart.  He is God, I am not.  He is perfect, I am not.  I used to plan ahead days and weeks.  Now it's truly one day at a time.  And at the end of the day often the only thing I can claim is that I attempted to do His Will. 

 

These kids at home, they bring me joy.  They do.  Even when I am in the depths of too much winter and too much snow, it's dark, I'm nauseous, and they are skating around me.  I get to hear "can I make you a coffee" or get a random treat picked up at the local market when they walk the dog.  I get hugs throughout the day and to teach them how to read.  It's a privilege and an honor and not what I expected all those years ago when I started homeschooling.  Some days are crazy making but others are beyond rewarding.  It's not pretty or neat or clean.  My kids aren't world scholars (although I think they are pretty smart). 

 

Jesus says you may lose everything to follow Him.  It's true.  I have lost all of who I was.  But I've gained more of who God has called me to be.  Even in the imperfection, grief, and hard times. 

 

Homeschooling in the hard times may not look like the Pinterest model of homeschooling but if it's what God has called you to He will provide.  

Happy Tuesday {Night} To You

 That face above reminds me that this morning sickness is worth it.  I'm knocked out most evenings so am missing things.  Brandon's 22nd Birthday was Sunday and we celebrated after Mass with sandwiches and cupcakes.  We also celebrated Mary and Sam that day since their birthdays are in February too.

A dear lady made this beautiful hat for Frances.  Isn't it the sweetest?  It's just about the only thing that makes me glad it's still winter and cold out.

Sorry, I know it's February in Michigan but this winter is hitting me hard.  Today I curled up and read some of St. Augustine's "Confessions" for a while.  His readings soothe my soul.  Co Op was cancelled today so I had all the kids home.  They are getting so house happy.  The younger set has been roller blading/skating through the house for hours a day.  It's, um, noisy.  But I can't blame them.  They play outside for as long as they can stand it, paint, roller skate, run in circles.....repeat.  

Well that's about all I have left in me at the end of this day.  Have a good one.

Happy 7th Birthday Mary Therese!

Happy 7th Birthday Mary Therese!  Time goes way to fast (do I say that every birthday?)

Mary is a delightful little girl who enjoys art, playing Little House with her sisters, and just generally has a sunny disposition.  She always tells it like it is, though, and keeps the rest of us in line.

We took her to Starbuck's earlier (where Brandon was working), then she went to the Children's Museum for a while, then to Grandma and Grandpa's for dinner, cake, ice cream, and presents!!

Thank you, Jesus, for sending us Mary!

What Women Need For Valentine's Day {Hint - NOT abortion}

I had the honor last night to go to a local crisis pregnancy center to "help" train their volunteer nurses who want to learn how to do ultra sounds on pregnant women.  The center was beautiful, the staff was friendly, there were stacks of diapers, clothes, bottles, blankets and other things that a woman in a crisis pregnancy might need.  So much for "pro lifers don't really care".  They do. These centers help women find ways to pay bills, rent, buy cars (or have them donated), get through school, find good, affordable child care, and so much more.  Planned Parenthood says that "Women Need Abortions For Valentine's Day" .  As I watched baby number 12, 7 weeks 5 days, on the ultra sound screen, heart beating away (not a life?  Just a blob?  I think not) I thought what women really need is to hear "it's going to be OK".  Our van is too small and so is our bank account.  Our house is cramped and my time is stretched thin.  Is this a "crisis" pregnancy?  Hardly.  But I've been in one of those too.  And he turns 22 on Sunday.  It's OK.  It was hard, ugly at times, touch and go, and society was sure to shame me for making the "choice" that, honestly, isn't supported ESPECIALLY by those who back Planned Parenthood.  They don't like stories like mine (and many of my friends) who struggled but came through on the other side OK.  Women don't need abortion. They need honest men that don't use them and then discard them AND their babies.  They need a society that doesn't promote promiscuity at every angle and then act surprised when girls at age 15 end up pregnant.  They need to be respected for who they are not for what they (don't) wear.  And so this pregnancy marches on.  I know society, in general, thinks I'm nuts.  I get some weird looks even from those in our church community.  I don't care much.  This baby was planned by God and is loved by us and so many others.  His heart beats, he is alive, and we are grateful.

The picture is upside down b/c I think it's easier to see.  Baby's head is at the top left.  You can make out the bottom, knees, and little foot.  7.5 weeks.  Choose life.

 

Daddy Daughter Dance, Random Thoughts, and Bottles

I can't believe it's been a week since I've been back here.  Picassa and blogger have been acting up on me making posting more difficult and time consuming.  Jesse and the six older girls went to a daddy/daughter dance at a nearby parish last weekend.  That left me at home with three boys and the baby.  We watched figure skating.  It's interesting to watch figure skating with boys instead of girls.  It was fun.  We all had a nice night, I think.

Back in my younger parenting days I took to heart way too many "all or nothing" parenting styles.  I'm not saying any of them are *bad* per se but I spent a lot of time doing things the hard way because I was so unbendable and took things to the extreme.  With this pregnancy I am running low on breast milk and Frances is not at all interested in food.  Enter the bottle.  My old La Leche League self would hate me but wow is it nice to be able to get away now and again.  She's having one or two bottles in the evening when my milk is low.  Jesse and the kids really enjoy having a chance to feed her and I can attend meetings or run to the store without feeling pressured to get back.  Drawbacks are that formula is PRICEY and so are bottles.  Wow.  But for only two a day we can handle it.  I'm not asking for a bottle vs breast controversy here.  It's scientifically proven that breast milk *is* better (especially in the first 6 months) but I can see the pros for bottle feeding as well.  I'm kind of in love with my cloth diapers so I'm not sure I'll be switching those out any time soon (and, really, I'm too cheap to buy disposables) but a bottle now and again isn't going to hurt anything.  It makes me sad to think of how bottle vs breast and other such parenting practices (co sleeping vs cribs comes to mind) pit mothers, who really just need support, against each other.  I won't say I wasn't one of *those* people that judged because I was.  I'm ashamed of it but I was.  Oh to be young and know everything again.....Alas with age I've softened, thank goodness, and with several life blows I've lost all ability to judge others, thanks be to God.   If only the "formulas" we are taught by the "experts" really could predict the outcome of our children.  They cannot.  You just do your best, pray, turn them over to God, and hope for the best.  Some kids learn faster than others.  Some fall hard.  We love them because in the end that's what God calls us to do.  I would love to tell the young moms that they should do their best, follow their instincts, but also know that you can do all the *right* things and not end up with what you thought you would.  That's ok.  Do it anyway. 

A Giving Heart

Due to finances and the stretching thin of mom (me) we only signed the 11 and older kids up for co op this semester.  That means I'm home with the 6 younger kids (8 and under).  It promised to be a long day as I walked down the stairs to last night's mess and chores undone.  I also had a paper to write for school and several other assignments to do plus a presentation to prepare.  Discourage by the crying baby I trudged along before I realized that those kids left with me at home are more than capable of helping.  Turns out they are eager too.  The big kids do so much around here that I often forget to let the littles help too.  Helping around the house teaches service and discipline among other things.  They jumped in to help bring hampers down, move laundry, empty the dishwasher, vacuum, and comfort the very fussy baby while I did my school and worked with them on theirs.  When I went up to lay Josie down for a nap I put Sam (8) in charge.  When I came down they had cleaned up the kitchen including wiping down the counters, picked up all the toys and clothes, and organized a bit too.  And I was only up there for about 10 minutes.  The baby was safely in her bumbo seat being entertained by various children who dropped off toys now and again. 

I'm so grateful for my little kids with great big GIVING hearts.  I have been very blessed.

Update on the ultrasound yesterday - thank you for the prayers!  Baby is doing great and due 9/29/2014.  This early part terrifies me so continued prayers are appreciated!