Your Miracle Is In Your Bowl {Ramblings On Grace}

"You are the God who performs miracles; you display your power among the peoples."

Psalm 77:14

When God shows Himself it's not always as you think it will be.  In a life like mine that moves in noise and chaos many days you have to pay attention or you will miss the miracles.  Sunday we were blessed to volunteer to help (as it turns out I basically ate and took in the sights but that's another story) with the Unite concert put on by the Sisters of Mary Mother of the Eucharist.  The goal of the concert was to bring awareness to the fact that we are all Christians no matter which church we attend and to highlight the absolute necessity of community!  My community over the last decade is a little different than what most would consider actual community.  I've been having babies and homeschooling and staying in touch or meeting most of my friends via the internet.  You may remember THIS POST from a couple of years ago.  Keisha is the most of my community.  To some that may seem wrong - to mostly have friendships online or via text.  But to me it's how I cope in this crazy life God has handed to me. 

Back to the day of the concert.  As Jesse, Augustine, and I watched Matt Maher doing his sound check and just minutes after chatting with Keisha about what tshirt sizes to get for her kids I got a much more alarming message.  Keisha had a placental abruption and was in critical condition.  Baby Faustina Claire, our goddaughter, was born without a heartbeat.  In a rare moment of being really imposing I asked everyone in that room to pray.  I asked the lovely Sisters and they were kind enough to listen to my ramblings.  I felt as though I had been hit by lightening.  I know so many of you answered my plea on Facebook and via text messages (or me hollering in your face).  THANK YOU!  God granted us a miracle that day.  It would be several hours before I knew exactly what was happening.  Many prayers later I received the best message ever - both are alive and baby is looking good!  Miracles are everywhere.  Everyday.  All is grace. 

I know there are stories that didn't end that way.  (It's not "over" btw and Keisha, especially, needs prayers to be restored to good health.)  I know there were times when I prayed for a miracle and my babies died, or other people suffered pains and losses.  We can't always see the beauty of God's plan when we are in the midst of devastation.  Maybe we never see it.  Maybe it's for the next generation to see.  But two days ago we received the kind of miracle you can see and touch.

As the story progressed I received so many messages asking how people could help.  Community.  People that had never met Keisha or her family.  People that had never even heard of them until that very day.  A friend suggested I start a Go Fund Me for Keisha and her family.  They have come so far and are leaving everything in God's hands.  They trust to be provided for and they give when it might seem to some that they have little to give.  Keisha's husband doesn't get paid time off from work.  When I had Augustine Jesse was blessed to have two weeks off.  And I still wasn't ready for him to go back when he did.  I know not all are so blessed but we were.  Anyway...more miracles.  People, strangers, the body of Christ started sending in money!  Most lessons to teach my kids about the power of prayer and generous hearts. 

So the last few days I've used the word "miracle" about five million times.  This morning as I prepared bowls of cereal I called Josie in and said (by accident) "your miracle is in your bowl".  Hannah looked at me and we laughed and then she said "well, it is the little things, right?".  Yes - we have cereal and freedom of religion and a home and health and the technology to watch a friend on her journey from unbaptized to trusting in God and coming through a horrific experience with grace.

During the concert we praised God together with thousands of other believers.  Some have suffered losses unimaginable to me.  Yet they were there, hands up, praising God.  You see faith means believing that God has a plan even when we can't see it, can't feel it.  Even when there's chaos, pain, noise, mundane life going on.  Your miracle may be "just" in a bowl.  But it's a miracle for that day.  That moment. 

Something Beautiful {Shattered Lives Made New}

"Surely God is my salvation;  I will trust and not be afraid.  The Lord, the Lord is my strength and my song; he has become my salvation." - Isaiah 12:2

 

If I had any artistic ability at all, I would paint my life on a canvas.  I would use radiant colors and intricate detail.  I would take my time, perhaps years, to complete it.  And then I would smash it.  Later I would piece it back together and know that in it's brokenness it has been made into something more beautiful.  Something imperfect but with more meaning then it had before.  It would perhaps take me more years to piece it back together then it did to originally paint it.  Life is that way, isn't it?  We think things (marriage, parenting, friendships, jobs, our Church family) should look a certain way.  We may even think it DOES look a certain way.  Then something happens, it's shattered, and we don't know what to do.  Do we sweep up the pieces and throw them away?  Perhaps it's 10, 15, 20 years of working at something.  Really giving it your all.  Only to have your child tell you all the ways that you failed, or you lose your job, or members of your church community just weren't who you wanted them to be.  What, then, do we do when we are faced with a pile of rubble in a world that replaces things that have broken or don't "work" the way we want them to?

 

 

Our society looks to things, situations, circumstances to fill us up and bring us "happiness".  But Christians are called to look at that which is broken and see how God can turn it into something different.  Things from the past cannot be fixed, changed, or taken away.  But they can be turned into something beautiful.  Recently I've felt challenged by Jesus to live a life of thankfulness.  Even today in one of my favorite devotionals Jesus Calling I read "I want your moments to be punctuated with thanksgiving....When you criticize or complain, you are acting as if you think you could run the world better than I do."  It goes on to say "I have designed you to live by faith, not by sight."  We often cannot see the beauty in our broken circumstances.  But faith teaches that we don't need to see it, we just need to believe the beauty is there and that it will all be revealed to us in God's time.  God's timing is always perfect.  When we refuse to face tough things, when we throw away marriages, friendships, families, and other uncomfortable circumstances we miss out on the beauty that God has in store for us.

 

 

I am not saying that we need to sit in our messy lives and wait for someone (or God) to clean it up.  We are responsible for what happens to us.  Aside from abusive situations, of course, we are not victims.  But for many of us how we choose to see what is happening affects our reactions and the course of our lives.  Pride, unforgiveness, blame, anger in our hearts.....those things are all from the evil one.  The one who wants us to live in isolation, blame God, and try to fill up on the junk in this world.  We are stronger than that.  We have the love and strength of Jesus.  We all do.  Those who have been steadfast believers forever and those who just gave their lives to Christ at Easter, or yesterday.  God's love and grace is there for all of us.  And with the power of Christ we can all take our broken pieces of life and turn them into something different. 

 

"He will have no fear of bad news; his heart is steadfast, trusting in the Lord." Psalm 112:7

 

Sometimes the Holy Spirit lights our souls on fire and we try to make amends with those whom we have hurt.  And those people don't respond or are unable to forgive for whatever reason.  Our efforts are still blessed.  Our broken situations can still be used for good.  Romans 8:28 says "For we know that ALL things work together for good for those who love God and have been called according to His purpose".  ALL THINGS.  When we invite Jesus in we have the ability to create new lives for ourselves, our kids, our spouses, and all those who's lives we touch. 

 

 

But life beats us down.  We mess up.  We fall out of line with our morals, our goals, our life's purpose.  We do the ugly things that we don't want to do.  We say hurtful, horrible, gross things.  Or we say nothing at all.  And those things ring in our head again and again.  The world screams "condemn".  The world screamed "crucify Him!".  Jesus says "mercy".  Jesus IS Mercy. 

 

 

In my nearly 20 years of marriage, 23 years of parenting, and 41 years of living a most imperfect life I've traveled many roads.  I've done the right things and the most awful wrong ones.  I've laid balled up and crumpled on the floor and cried for my wrongs and for those whom I have perceived have wronged me.  I (hopefully) have another half of life ahead of me but I could be gone tomorrow so I will say this; the only thing that has saved me (after my relationship with Jesus, of course)  is learning to get back up, dust off my knees, and start again.  My floors are a dirty mess, my walls have finger prints and crayon marks.  My soul is marred with choices made from a lack of virtue and a false belief that  satisfying myself in the moment was worth any consequence.  Laundry undone, dishes in the sink, and a "to do" list bigger than Santa's Christmas naughty and nice scroll.  I cannot live each day with intention because I'm me and I just don't live in such a pretty way.  But I can live each moment with gratefulness and believe that no matter how shattered and broken life gets, God will turn it into something beautiful.  Jesus' body was broken for us, shoved away behind a stone, but on Easter Sunday He escaped from the brokenness and because of Him being broken (by our sins) WE are blessed.  I don't know where this life will lead me, the pain I will have, the joy that God has in store.  Every day has it's ups and downs, disappointments and surprises.  For me, focusing on God and believing that my masterpiece will be pieced back together into a beautiful mosaic and that my life will speak His Love to all those that I come into contact with.  I will not worry about what is to come but will seek His will with trust and confidence.

 

 

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus...And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus" - Philippians 4:6-7, 19

 

 

 

 

Gratitude Sunday

 

Spring is HERE.  I think for real.  It's almost 70 degrees today.  Lots of outside time and ice cream and dirty feet and tired kids.  Praise Jesus for sunshine!

 

 

Kids are healthy and there has been no vomit for two plus weeks.  Praise Jesus for health!

 

With a new spring comes new tasks accomplished by the kids.  Cecilia can make it all the way across on the monkey bars this year without help!

 

We have about a month left of school (who's counting?) and Greenfield Village opens on Wednesday!  It's bound to be a great week.  Keeping you all in prayer.  Please pray for us too.

Happy 7 Months Augustine!

Happy 7 months Augustine John Paul Pio!!

 

Still has blue eyes.  Still a (mostly) happy guy.

 

Still adored by his siblings (especially big brother Sam)

 

He's ready to support the Tigers, play some ball, and probably crawl very soon.

 

He even got a special visit from his godfather today!  What a good day for Augustine!!

 

 

On Ressurecting Gratitude Sunday And Hot Water Heaters {He Is Risen!}

Well I make no guarantees that my gratitude will be posted ON Sundays since two babies and ten other kids of varying ages keeps me off the computer and on my toes 24/7 but today seemed like a good day to count blessings.  God speaks to me at unusual times and in unusual ways.  Last night the hot water heater went out.  I mean it really just wasn't working.  I couldn't get any hot water, light the pilot light and it appeared to not be getting power at all.  I chalked it up to a last minute Lenten sacrifice but tried to fix it all the same.  I spent a good amount of time (after midnight) looking at you tube explanations and Wikipedia advice about how to fix it.  I spent time hollering at God that THIS DAY WAS IMPORTANT.  After so long it was the day that Mary and Cecelia would finally make their First Holy Communions and while a warm shower isn't necessary it sure would be nice plus the price of a new hot water heater wasn't appealing to me at a time when I just sat down to pay the bills and thought "ok, I can almost kind of breath a little bit after paying this bill...."  But there I was in the basement at close to 1 am considering dismantling a hot water heater (after hard boiling dozens of eggs, filling baskets, days of fasting, outfit planning...well.  I wasn't thinking so clearly).  In the end I decided to go to bed.  I laid my hands on that hot water heater and prayed "Bridget the Brave please tell Jesus to fix this" or some such thing even though I know a hot water heater is NOT essential and is most certainly a privilege to have.  So I went to bed and did what seemed logical after not dismantling a hot water heater - I cried.  Through my tears I said things like "we don't have the flu, we have running water, we have eachother, we have a fabulous parish, we have a working coffee maker, we have coffee...."  Before I knew it hours were passing and I was STILL counting my blessings.  The hot water heater seemed so insignificant compared to all the things we have been blessed with.  I resolved to suck up the cold shower (showers are blessings hot or cold), heat up water on the stove to wash Mary's hair (the other girls had bathed the night before) and just leave it be for the day.  I spent almost the whole night awake.  Augustine isn't much of a sleeper these days anyway.  Lots of time to pray and give thanks.  Morning arrived and I prepared to hold my breath and shower.  Then I noticed there was hot water.  I had left the hot water heater OFF and unplugged.  I figured it was leftover.  I took a quick one hoping there would be enough left for the kids who needed showers too.  Jesse came down and plugged the hot water heater in and turned it on.  It worked.  No problems at all.  I perceived that he thought I made the whole thing up but really I didn't. It did NOT work.  At all.  No sound, no power, no light, nothing.  I've fixed it before many times.  As someone on my facebook said - the hot water heater was resurrected!  Praise God!  I know it sounds far fetched, coincidental, and kind of like "why does God care about your hot water heater but not world hunger" but it is what it is.  That incident caused me to spend HOURS counting blessings.  Things I hadn't really thought about for a very long time. 

And so our beautiful girls, Mary Therese and Cecilia Ruth, received Jesus in the Eucharist for the very first time today.  Their faces glowed.  They have been counting down for months and months.  We gathered in a packed church surrounded by babies and children, friends and strangers, we praised God and soaked in the radiance of these kids and their moment.  I pray it's a moment they will all remember forever.  I pray they will keep coming back again and again.  As Cecilia said "receiving Jesus gives us Grace".  Indeed it does.  And now for the onslaught of pictures.  Happy Easter everyone.  He is Risen.  He is Risen Indeed!!!

 

 

 

 

"He himself bore our sins" in his body on the cross, so that we might die to sins and live for righteousness; "by his wounds you have been healed"

1 Peter 2:24

 

 

 

When You Failed Lent {Again} And A Prayer Request

Well here we are up against the Triduum.  40 days have come and gone.  "I think I failed Lent" I said to Hannah this morning.  "Your life is Lent" she answered.  Ha.  I'm not sure about that although sometimes it feels like it.  Rarely eating meals, hardly sleeping, just generally living the life of a mom.  A mom of many.  This Lent we endured weeks of viruses and stomach flu's, a winter that wouldn't let go (although today is sunny).  But life marches on and so does Lent.  With or without our heart being in it.  Last week I found out a dear friend of Jesse and mine from college passed away.  It came as a shock and really made me think about my days.  Am I living them like they could be my last.  Getting lost in the constant piles of laundry, dishes, cooking, schooling, diapers.  Nursing the baby every 30 minutes or so.  Trying to keep up with commitments and family and marriage life.  Some time ago I committed to the "seven sacred pauses" and stopping to pray multiple times a day.  Fitting it all in is overwhelming enough and now I wonder if I'm living "with intention" as they say.  Am I living each day as my last?  Of course being human, I am not.  Earlier this week we also found out a friend from church was diagnosed with an aggressive form of cancer (see the Novena beginning TODAY below).  Again I re examined how I'm living my life.  Am I appreciating the moments, kids, meals, times?  No.  *If* I knew today was my last day how would I live?  And is it really realistic to think we can live each day as our last?  Because who would do laundry or dishes on their last day?

At the beginning of Lent I made many resolves.  Mostly I wanted to come out better than when I went in.  I'm sorry to say that I did not do that.  Jesse and I went to a talk by Dr. Janet Smith last weekend.  She spoke about how when you make a resolve to change something Satan fights HARD against you making those changes.  She says he loses interest if you stay strong.  I don't think I stayed strong.  At least not strong enough.  It's a good thing for me that while Lent is a good time to purify our hearts and give of ourselves more for Jesus, we are not confined to these 40 days.  Each day brings a new chance to begin again.  And while we should keep in mind that each day may be our last and be mindful of taking advantage of frequent confession, daily Mass, the chance to tell loved ones how we truly feel (er...charitably in certain cases) we also have to live responsibly and in doing so do the Will of God for our lives.  For me that's laundry, dishes, diapers, cooking, cleaning, and educating our children at home.  In so doing I am living MY life to the fullest as HE has called me to do.  Failing Lent is perhaps insignificant in the big scheme of things.   1 Corinthians 9:24 reads "run so as to win the race".  From my perspective, winning is making it to Heaven (after a long stay in purgatory I'm sure).  In simpler terms, as is said in the Disney movie Finding Nemo "just keep swimming".  Life is fast paced in this household.  Lents will come and go.  At the end of my life, as St. John of the Cross says, I will be judged on love alone.  I'm not suggesting that we ignore the beauty of the Church's Liturgical Year.  As Mother Teresa said "“God does not require that we be successful only that we be faithful.”   So I will make resolves again and again, Lent or not, and try my hardest to resist the devils temptations and stick to them, knowing that Jesus will be there to dust off my knees and help me up should I fail again. 

As we enter the Triduum, the most holy days of our liturgical year, I am grateful for Jesus' sacrifice of Himself for me so that each day is new and fresh, a clean slate. 

 

Please join us in prayer for the Hill family wherever you may be and however you can:

 

As some of you may be aware, the Hill family is in need of our prayers and support. Our dear friend and brother Brian has been diagnosed with cancer. 

 

If you would like to join us to pray a Rosary novena for God's healing upon Brian, we will be gathering at OLGC on Wednesday 4/1 through Thursday 4/9 at 9:30 PM in the main sanctuary (and in the grotto on 4/2 and 4/4 since the church is not available then).  We will have a basket for cards that will be delivered to Brian and Angela if you wish to write a note. If you are not able to attend, please consider joining us in spirit by saying the rosary and prayer to St. Peregrine at 9:30 PM on those days.

  

Let us take this time to lift up Brian, Angela, Andri, Ally, Vincent and their extended families in fervent prayer; and let us call on Mary our beloved Mother to take all of our intentions to her Son. 

 

https://www.ewtn.com/Devotionals/novena/peregrine.htm