Finding Beauty In All Things

The storm came on fast and furious.  We closed the windows and watched.  Some of us watched outside while others (me) watched from our "i" device's weather APP. I was slightly annoyed because Jesse and I had planned our Thursday night "Date Night" which includes a visit to Trader Joe's.  Minor compared to those that lost homes, of course, but that was my selfish thinking at the time.  We made it out of the house a couple of hours later than planned.  As I bemoaned the rushed experience we witnessed this breathtaking sunset.  We drove towards it, past the store where we were heading, hoping to capture the beauty for a while longer.  Didn't I just write about life fleeting?  As I watched the sun sink into the hills I felt like my Lent was sinking with it.  And what *am* I doing?  Lent is half over.  HALF OVER and I have long since lost my inspiration.  I have wained a bit from my daily readings and prayers.  I'm ashamed.  Jesus is marching toward His imminent crucifixion and I'm forgetting to pray, and read, and meditate on God's Word.

The weather has been unusually warm.  Like HOT.  As Hannah said "we skipped two seasons.  I'm not sure I'm ready for this"  I woke up this morning with mosquito bites on my feet and ankles, I spent two hours in the night worried about our weekend obligations, and it was stuffy in my room.  WORRY, ANXIETY, ANGER, NASTY WORDS, BROKEN LENTEN PROMISES......

But there is BEAUTY and I'm choosing not to see it.  I'm pushing away smiling faces and calling my crabbiness sleep deprivation or "busy-ness".  A full weekend, yes, a full weekend with active, healthy, and happy children and a husband BY MY SIDE.  A weekend that involves prayer, walks, hugs, happiness. 

I opened my book mid afternoon (OK, my Kindle - I can't help it.  I'm a techie girl) and this came into view.  Something I'd highlighted a few weeks back when I was still inspired, motivated, peaceful :
"Be diligent in these matters; give yourself wholly to them, so that everyone may see your progress" (1 Timothy 4:15)

The apostle Paul is telling Timothy "You are not perfect but people should see PROGRESS in your life.  In a number of years you should be wiser, stronger, and more mature in character than you are now" (taken from the book Sacred Influence by Gary Thomas).  And so it is with Lent.  I wonder if I've made ANY changes worth celebrating come Easter morning.  A daily examination of conscience keeps me on my toes.  And finding beauty - Jesse and his fan club of kids.  BLESSINGS always - even when they cry, ask for a drink 7,000 times/day, fight, cry, need, NEED, NEED.  Always beautiful, always blessings.